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It’s been absolutely mad the last quarter of the year, at work, at home, in general. I’ve had no time to write anything nor I felt I wanted to. I don’t really understand how someone can sit there and blog on a daily basis, life is too busy by itself to keep a blog running, but then what do I know.

Start of a new year, a breaking point between the past and the future months, but is it really?

I’ve been off for the Christmas break since the 24th of Dec until the 5th of Jan. We’ve spent Christmas at home, with some friends and no family. It was a bit hard this time around. F..king covid. I was really looking forward to some sort of a mental break, a reset, from all the strain at work, but the few days of camping we did over the New Year Eve did not suffice. Pretty sure one more week would feel long enough as a break. I still feel drained and tired. Too many things on my mind playing up and draining me. And the recent 2 weeks brought more things to worry about, concerning my health, things I cannot attend to, due to lack of disposable income left at the end of the month. Think the body is breaking, slowly.

I have too many wants and needs, that I don’t think are exuberant, however I also feel guilty for having those wants and needs, as I feel I should be grateful for all I have. Happiness comes from appreciation of what you have and saying thanks to yourself and others for where you are in life. Unhappiness comes from wanting what others have, but you don’t.

I really wish my finances got back on track, so that I can go for a massage, a few times, to get my body to where it used to be and recover feeling relaxed and not poisoned by all the stress and anxieties.

I really wish my finances got back on track, so that I can go to the dentist and sort out a few problematic things that I have been advised to sort out 2 years ago, and also sort out one more that just popped up.

I really wish my finances got back on track, so that I have some savings in case of emergency, of any kind.

I really wish my finances got back on track, so that I can feel I’m contributing a lot more to the household than I feel I am at the moment.

I really wish my finances got back on track, so that I don’t feel guilty when I buy 2 almond croissants for breakfast on days I go into the office (because I don’t wake up early enough to make anything to eat at home).

Yes, it’s not all about the money in life I know. But the problem is without the money, you can’t buy anything, even the smallest of things that might make you happy for a moment. It’s what’s left at the end of the month for me is a little problem, and I am on a good salary.

I want my peace of mind and happiness back this year, so that I can look after myself, so that I can look after everyone I love as best as I can, without being preoccupied with nonsense.